Sinking deeper
Vast depression Lonely Self-inflict oppression Accumulating Of confessions Shadow boxing All omissions Hardly grasping Onto edges Peering off of Steeper ledges Falsifying All the pledges Shifting aimless Building wedges Walls are closing Fading sunlight Doubt becoming Painful to fight Struggling I strain to keep sight Of possibilities; So I fight Staring into Fires burning Flames rise higher As does yearning Despair can fade So I’m learning Heal and conquer Scars I’m earning The world has helped me Strike the matches With each fail Inferno flashes Look around To see the clashes Like the Phoenix Rise from ashes Time is never Everlasting No freeze-frame wishes, Moulds or casting Moments precious Memories passing Life continues Far surpassing The world is so Unusual You must seek out The beautiful Become truth Irrefutable Be an ordinary Miracle Watch Over You – Alter Bridge https://youtu.be/9lIdymq0DZc
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Theoretical Reality. My mind is like a box of fireworks. The briefest thought acts as a match that can spark an entire display that enraptures the masses. But just as easily a solitary notion stemming from doubt can create a monolithic emptiness that burns the brilliance into nothingness. Thoughts become pure energy and hold vast amounts of power over your tangible world. One theory as of late is that those who claim to be advocating realism are actually voicing an attitude of pessimism. I believe that I must find the sacred in the ordinary and always go the extra mile. (Don’t worry: it’s rarely crowded, so you can avoid a lot of people! Ha!) Life is ENTIRELY a theoretical journey! Your theories can change daily as you live, laugh, learn, love…and even lose. How I view my world is ALWAYS my choice. I can focus on my falls or I can brush myself off as I look towards the sky and climb once more. It may be hard but the view of success after overcoming odds is spectacular! I am not allowed the luxury of do-overs, there is no rewind button, and I refuse to let anyone’s opinion define my reality. This is what sets me apart. This is what people run from: I am committed to myself. So, I am indeed my worst enemy, especially if the demons of doubt persuade me to fail. Well, guess what? I’ve failed before. I’ll likely fail again…but each time I promise to Fail Better. I believe that I deserve the rewards that will come because I persevere; because I dare to dream. I have never fit in anyway; why would I want to start now? If greatness was easy, more people would be doing it. You don’t have to be great to start…you just have to start to be great. I am not afraid to act silly. Life is serious enough, knowing that one day it will all be over. What will I – can I - leave behind? I am always teetering on the edge of where theory becomes reality; by doing so I live the best of both worlds. Welcome to my Theoretical Reality.
Written two years ago..and applies tonight once more...
The last few weeks have been a gauntlet of fear for me in many aspects. For the most part I know what I am afraid of, but avoidance is no longer an option. In the beginning I felt as if I was being thrown in with the Garthok, without even a clue, but the last two weeks have revealed that I have been unknowingly hammering away at my fears and chiseling them down to more manageable entities. I am watching the cracks reveal the possibilities beyond and I’m finding confidence in places I never thought to look. Fear is only as deep as my mind allows it to be. This is not to say that fear doesn't have its rightful place. For without fear, we may not truly comprehend what it is stake. The problem I have had is that I have allowed certain fears to cripple me. I have given fear permission to control and overwhelm me for far too long, thus limiting my potential; my growth. I haven’t had the faith in myself that others have had and I am truly grateful for all of the encouragement (and patience) I have received. An epiphany has occurred as I realize what I have done this week alone: by letting go of my mistakes, dousing the fire of anxiety surrounding what I perceive to be expectations, and now taming my fear, I have opened the door to a better quality of life. As I walk through into the next fun house, I guess the only question that still remains is: What can be accomplished if I wasn't afraid? |
Julie WestphalAuthor, Poet, Dreamer Archives
February 2024
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